When Hernan Garcia comes to mind several words are immediately associated; majestic, serene, temperate, coordinated, and nice are not among these words. No, as his friends can testify, the essence of Hernan is difficult, if not impossible, to define with simple two dimensional words; even three dimensional words would be hard pressed to muster a viable definition. However, the outside world might find this afore mentioned list of words quite suitable for describing Hernan. This fact raises many fundamental questions as to the true nature of Mr. Garcia. Is his soul ravaged by the unbridled fury of one thousand suns going supernova, as his behavior might suggest, or is Hernan’s essence more like a light rain with the occasional cloud break? This is the primary question we hope to address in this analysis. Join us, if you dare, as we undertake an expedition into one of the least understood and least explored regions of our world, into the mind of Hernan Garcia.
All of Hernan’s friends have observed the wild personality fluctuations that Hernan is subject to. Scientists have yet to determine just what drives this oscillatory behavior pattern, and many believe that uncovering the mysteries within Hernan’s consciousness may be an unattainable goal, given the limitations of modern day technology. However, we are not without hope, many breakthroughs have been made in recent years in the effort to effectively model Hernan’s personality. Through careful observation, researchers have discovered a direct and stunning correlation between the quantity of beef Hernan consumes and the volatility of his personality. When interviewed renowned Garcolagist Scott Thompson had this to say about the effect of meat on Hernan’s demeanor, “A big steak really seems to act as a stabilizing agent, reducing both the number and intensity of Hernan’s fluctuations. We also observe a drastic upward shift in personality after consuming a large quantity of meat, it’s almost as if he enters a state of euphoria.”(Thompson) With all this research in support of the unstable Garcia model, can we really formulate a viable argument for the temperate soul? Could Hernan really just be a nice guy?
Observers have noted that Hernan Garcia does not display the same radical tendencies at school as he does to his close friends and family. He appears to the world as a mild mannered, “nice” individual, with perhaps a hint of anger. So how can we explain this drastic deviation in Hernan’s character? We believe that his nice personality is a vital characteristic that must have evolved into the Garcia over hundreds of years. This trait is a survival tactic that allows Hernan to interact with normal human beings, and not be perceived as insane. While his close friends find the contrast between his spontaneous irate ranting and childlike irrepressible glee to be extremely humorous, an ancient culture might abandon or sacrifice Hernan out of fear that his “disease” might be infectious. Clearly this would not occur in a more developed culture, but his “nice” trait has not yet become obsolete. Though it is not likely that Hernan would be ritualistically sacrificed in a developed culture, there is still a strong possibility that he would be deemed insane. Such a title would serve to limit his interactions with society and would not bode well for survival, even in a modern day society. Thus we posit that it is the passionate and angry Hernan that lies at the heart of the beast; the beast simply wears a fuzzy mask to hide his ferocious nature.
This ability to appear to be “nice” serves as a mask for Hernan protecting his true nature from the world. It keeps him safe, and prevents the unbridled fury and frenzied abandon of his soul from wreaking havoc on the world. Similarly, the mighty superman takes on the disguise of the mild mannered Clark Kent. This disguise allows him to acquire a level of safety from his enemies, and it allows him to fit-in to normal society. Without his alter ego, superman would be unable to carry on even the semblance of a normal life. It is for these same reasons that Hernan dawns his fuzzy mask. It affords him a level of safety from potential enemies, as well as those who might fail to appreciate the mystery and wonder that lie in he heart of Hernan. Additionally, it allows him to blend in with normal society, analogous to an emulator that allows Hernan to interface with the rest of the world. At the same time this fuzzy mask deprives the world of the wonder that is truly Hernan Garcia. |
Akin to the phoenix of yore Mr Compy 2.0 has risen from the ashes!! The server fell shortly after Mr. Compy 2.0, son of Mr. Compy 1.0 (aka, The DECIMATOR!), contracted a severe case of MHDF (Massive Hard Drive Failure) his 3rd and largest hard drive was deemed responsible and had to be removed. This was necessary in order to stabilize the patient and ensure containment of the syndrome; since, as you all know, MHDF is highly infectious. The good people of Maxtor quickly settled the situation with a shiny new donor drive. Sadly the unholy 3rd drive, the drive that dared to defy the godly might of Mr. Compy 2.0, son of Mr. Compy 1.0 (aka, The DECIMATOR!), faced the unbridled fury of Baron von Ball-peen and his assistant Dr. S. Driver. Reportedly its unholy shell was sundered forth with frenzied abandon; in the hope that all drives may tread lightly knowing full well the cost of betrayal!! But I digress; the 3rd drive contained an astronomical percentage of my music, as well as all the FTP files. Thus the long period of down time, but Compy 2.0 has been restored, and the world can rest easy once again!!Current Mood: Filled with frenzied abandon |
All plans to move the Live Journal to Nima's Wall have been scraped. This decition was made due to the limited capacity of the Wall. We are working hard to resolve this issue, but no solution has been found. Therefor, for the time being future posts will be made here.
-Eggiman staff
(As seen on Nima's Wall)
So Nima I had this idea, what if the Care Bear Nation came under attack by a demonic force? How would they defend themselves? There so unprepaired for a war against the minions of hell. Its really very troubling, I cant seem to get it of my mind. Well any way Feliz Navidad and all that jazz.
0000000000000000000000000000 ()---() 00000000000000
000000000000000000000000 ,___( ^_^ )___,00000000000
000000000000000000, 00000(____________)000000000000
000000000000000 __)\_ 00000000( H*B )00000000000000
000000000(\_.-' '' ````` *`-. 00 _./ .-.._000000000
Demon->> (/~~````(/~^^` 00(___/ \___)00000000000000
I see WPI has raised yoour ASCII art to new and unfathomable levels, us mere amatures cower in awe. However, wouldn't they just use their care power and those little light beams from those lucky charm type things on their chests would drive back the forces of evil? I think a more intriguing question is, what would Nima look like as a care bear?
-Scott(erdooo)
Ahh yes, the point you bring up here Mr. Thompson is a very important one; and im pleased you brought it up. You see, the care bears so called "power" can be used only to aid those in need. This is fine for your everyday evils, like j-walking, littering, drivebyes, mass murder, and even the impotent fools at Subway who have the gaul to claim swiss cheese is to expensive. However, this is preaty much the limit of their powers. Against a demonic force of any significance the care bear's powers would prove insignificant. While it is unclear how the Care Bears would respond to a direct assault on their cloud based homeworld, it is highly unlikely that they would beable to fend off an attack.
Upon analysis of their previouse battles, the care bears would have to increase their power significantly to have any hope of puting up a sucessful defence. Since increasing the Care Bears magical beams would clearly involve hundreds of thousands of years in focused evolutionary efforts. This could be acheaved by systematicaly killing off the weaker members of the Care Bear comunity, thereby preventing them from reproducing. There are several ways in which this could be acheaved one posebility would involve a gladiator style battle system. Such a system could promote comunity gathering among the populuse, as well as increase theirpropensity for combat situations. However, this would go against everything the Care Bear society stands for, and would require a mass restructuring of the society. It is likely that their current leader would need to experiance an untimely death by the hands of a far more tyrannical and militeristic Care Bear; perhaps in a grand cudeta. In time the Care Bears may become a fierce warrior race, akin to the Spartans of old. The major problem with this survival plan is the shear amount of time it would take to reshape the deep rooted ideals of the Care Bear population. Given a limited time frame a plan involving less drastic alterations to the Care Bear population.
The only fesable plan for the care bears lies in one of their lesser used abilities. Their ability to manipulate clouds in to transportation devices, if properly developed could be their only hope for survival. With enough training i'm confident that the Care Bears could advance this ability into a great wepon of war. The power of clouds should not be taken lightly, if you have doubts, just look at lightning, tornados, or floods. With sufficent mastery of cloud manipulation the Care Bears may stand a chance against the minions of hell, but they would not escape unscathed. There would certainly be significant caualties, but more importantly their little fuzzy hands would be staned with the blood of the damed.
As for your second point, Nima as a Care Bear. Frankly I think he'd preaty much look, well, exactly like he does now. I mean look at the facts, short, fuzzy, and a glowing picture on his abdomen. Its preaty clear nima meets all of the Care Bear criteria. Well i better go do some work, clearly im procrastinating hehe. :)Current Mood:  bored |
Note to all readers of the Eggiman Digest. Until further notice all live journal activities will be moved to Nima Karamooz's wall; on the face book. Thank you for your understanding and please be patient as we work through this transition. Your business is important to us and we look forward to a lucrative and intruiguing future. Thanks
-Eggiman StaffCurrent Mood:  satisfied |
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Mar. 18th, 2004 @ 06:59 pm
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If you shoot at mimes, should you use a silencer? |
| » My Guitar Gently Weeps! |
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So long have I pondered the coming of the end, and for so long I have accepted it as an inevitability. How could the human race possibly fight a war against the will of fate, such a thing could never succeed. For fate is not one to be swayed by the weapons of man. But what if man were to ally with fate itself. What if man could cast all doubts of the future aside and accept, no, to embrace, wholly that which is inevitable. Once the inevitable progression of time has been accepted man could invest his energy preparing for its arrival. This is the only way that humans will have hope of surviving the coming times. If human kind is to survive we must be proactive. We must enslave our foes before they enslave us. We will use their strengths to bolster our own weaknesses. We will take their advantages and make them our own, and by doing so we will ensure that humankind will again crawl from nature’s battlefield as the dominant species one the planet. To ensure we achieve this goal I propose we create a new organization. An organization to lead all of humankind to this future, an organization to ensure our survival, an organization to neutralize the dolphin threat for all eternity. This will ensure that the people of earth are never again placed in such a precarious predicament. This all important group shall be known as The International Nautical Termination and Empathic League, or The INTEL. The INTEL’s first task shall be to harness the dolphins greatest asset, their minds. This project will be known only as project Bumblewood, or possibly Pentium 6. Pentium 6 will harness the brain of a dolphin and integrate it with modern computing technology. This chip must also feature state of the art tuna safe technology. When this project is compleated the dolphins intelligence will be at humankinds disposal and will be used for the good of the humans every where. From this day on this plan will be known as provision 1 of the Eggiman Global Defense Policy.
Oct. 22nd, 2003 @ 06:02 pm
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| » Stupid!!! HARD DRIVE |
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I fear that I have unleashed upon this world an unspeakable evil. In my hast I have opend a varitable pandoras box. But I blame only myself for my failure, how could i listen to David. By doing so I have tampered with forces that mear mortals where not ment to alter. For such things as these where ment only for the gods. But i will not let the evil consume this world, I cannot. I will travle this world to stop the evil that I have unleashed, I shall track it to the ends of the earth and beyond. If necessary I will dive into to the darkest corner of hell to free this lost soal from evil. For the smell of evil is strong in this being, there is no were it can go that I will not find him. But his power is not to be taken lightly for it has defeated all those who have battled it. Its power is that of absolute darkness, darkness that will consume all but the brightest light. Despite these hardships, I must defeat it for I am the one who uleashed it upon this world. For the sake of this world I cannot fail, I shall unleash upon it all of the power and fury that lies within me. No being has yet resisted and lived. It is with this power that i will defeat JP's external harddrive.
Oct. 19th, 2003 @ 06:52 pm
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| » Swiss cheese and Dolphins |
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My mind is tormented by many things. Like why theres only one subway in the world that has Swiss cheese. I mean it is obviously the best cheese so why the hell dosent every subway have it. They claim "it's to expensive," but i have come to the conclusion that this is just a coverup. The joys of swiss cheese cannot compare to any earthly object like money. Therefor, it must be a conspiracy concocted by the government, in order to build up their swiss cheese supply. They do this not because they themselves love the smooth holy texture of swiss cheese, those bureaucratic fools don't have the brain power to process such things. They do this in preparation for the coming war against swiss terrorists. This combined with the recent undersea activities of our air breathing counterparts, has left me rather drained to say the least. Flipper, friendly dolphin lifeguard or a devious trick?
Oct. 19th, 2003 @ 06:27 pm
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swisskemobob's journal