My Guitar Gently Weeps!
So long have I pondered the coming of the end, and for so long I have accepted it as an inevitability. How could the human race possibly fight a war against the will of fate, such a thing could never succeed. For fate is not one to be swayed by the weapons of man. But what if man were to ally with fate itself. What if man could cast all doubts of the future aside and accept, no, to embrace, wholly that which is inevitable. Once the inevitable progression of time has been accepted man could invest his energy preparing for its arrival. This is the only way that humans will have hope of surviving the coming times. If human kind is to survive we must be proactive. We must enslave our foes before they enslave us. We will use their strengths to bolster our own weaknesses. We will take their advantages and make them our own, and by doing so we will ensure that humankind will again crawl from nature’s battlefield as the dominant species one the planet. To ensure we achieve this goal I propose we create a new organization. An organization to lead all of humankind to this future, an organization to ensure our survival, an organization to neutralize the dolphin threat for all eternity. This will ensure that the people of earth are never again placed in such a precarious predicament. This all important group shall be known as The International Nautical Termination and Empathic League, or The INTEL. The INTEL’s first task shall be to harness the dolphins greatest asset, their minds. This project will be known only as project Bumblewood, or possibly Pentium 6. Pentium 6 will harness the brain of a dolphin and integrate it with modern computing technology. This chip must also feature state of the art tuna safe technology. When this project is compleated the dolphins intelligence will be at humankinds disposal and will be used for the good of the humans every where. From this day on this plan will be known as provision 1 of the Eggiman Global Defense Policy.